Somehow I feel that I shouldn’t share these words that are so close to me though as I read it how can I not I ask myself. It’s not a tribute to the lost but a roadmap to a peace. These words being two years old as I read them still they invoke something that cries out to say, “Live”! I believe that we are so much more connected to one another than most of us are willing to entertain. Life is a canvas of many moments which contain many pictures and mine says to me live; not in uncertainty but live in freedom of the knowledge and in it share it because you never know who you will touch by doing so!
These words are from my writings a couple of years ago titled, “Breathe, Her Last Breath before Goodbye”
As I sit here starring into the shell of a woman who has the authority to invoke any emotion within me with each moment my superman exterior begins to breakdown and I realize that I am not so strong especially when my heart is overcome with this kind of grief and silence. I am comfortable with the fact that we must live and that we must die; I’m am very uncomfortable with those terms. In my tough exterior I can even maintain when someone close to me passes. Death itself is merely a means to an end though the journey to death is the road that wipes the strength from even the strongest of man. Love is the strongest virtue of a person and offers fuel to the emotion of loss – while the depression of thought consumes our being because we hold on to it with such a firm grip as if something in it will change! The only change that will come is when we decide to let go. Our reality is shaped by the things that we hold on to for those are the things that we treasure. How can I be a better man if my continence is in the past? I pull from my past while living my present the result is my future – the destiny of who I will be is directly tied to what I believe. My past becomes more of a road map vice a centerpiece for life.
Thank you for reading Derrick.